Years ago, my family used to be into boating. We’d go out on the weekends with no plan other than to feel the warm ocean breezes and to dock for lunch in places we wouldn’t be inclined to drive to. Our outings were mostly jaunts along the coast of the Long Island Sound; but occasionally, we’d take longer trips.
One time, we decided to go to Newport, Rhode Island. In the morning when we left, it was picturesque. The sky was clear, the water calm. We passed the hours holding our two sons-aged two and four at the time- on our laps, laughing, talking, and enjoying the freedom of the wide-open seas.
About six hours into the trip, we noticed the sun slip behind a few clouds. We looked out into the distance and saw the skies were changing and we thought, “Better get the boys down below. Rain is coming.” Little did we know that we were in for something far worse than rain.
As we pressed toward Newport, the sun disappeared entirely. At first, it was still bright enough to see the lobster pots and other boats in the distance, but soon, the air was so thick, we couldn’t even see the water when we looked over the side of the boat. We were surrounded by a blanket of white, completely blinded by the fog.
For me, this was a moment of paralyzing fear. Should we continue forward or stay put? In one scenario, we wouldn’t be able to see what was in front of us. In the other, we ran the risk of being unseen by others.
We were literally stuck in a sea of uncertainty with no good choices.
As time has put much space between this incident and me, I have come to realize that this moment is a perfect metaphor for many of life’s hardships. We all go through stuff-breakups, rejections, unexpected changes-that leave us feeling adrift in a haze of uncertainty.
That day, out there in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, the consensus was to power forward. Doing something gave us a sense of being in control; however, the truth was, my family and I would have been no less safe had we decided to drop anchor and wait for the skies to clear.
It is in times of uncertainty that we long most to feel in control; however, maybe that’s exactly the reason we repeatedly experience these moments in our lives-to remind us that when the fog rolls in, where we dock next, and whether we arrive safely isn’t up to us. We just have to have faith that we’ll get there.
Originally published at https://fiftysilverlinings.com on September 8, 2020.
